The Best Friends Anthology (A New City Story Book 5) Page 21

  “I will.”

  He expelled a breath and pushed me back. I went with a laugh.

  Putting the condom on, he crawled over me, a hint of dark want in those expressive eyes. Pushing my legs wide apart, I watched him, curious.

  He pulled one leg over his shoulder and entered. Deep and hard. I cried out. When I opened my eyes, he was smiling.

  “Ready?”

  I held his wrists. “Please.”

  Slow at first, he hummed and shifted a little and then fucked me.

  My whole body took it.

  I’d rarely achieved any kind of orgasm through penetration, and though he felt incredible, and I wanted it, I didn’t feel the spark of pleasure.

  He slowed and tilted his head. “You okay?”

  “Thinking.”

  He caught his breath with raised brows. “That’s not good for a guy’s ego, you know.”

  I laughed, and he moaned, grinding into me.

  “Is wonder vag contracting?”

  He pressed his face into my calf and laughed before nipping, and I squealed.

  “So okay, you’re not into pounding.”

  “I am, you feel so good, and I like the connection.”

  He went serious.

  “What?”

  “Other way around?”

  “What do you mean?”

  “You pound me.”

  I perched up on my elbows. Well, there was a game changer.

  Will went red. “That’s, it’s, anyway.”

  “No, wait. What do you mean?”

  He kind of grimaced and went to pull out, but I held him, contracting around his cock until he closed his eyes.

  “Tell me.”

  He grunted and started moving again. “There’s something else. I sometimes like to sub.”

  “Really?” I propped myself up, so I spoke close to his mouth. “A few years back, a friend of mine started running a domme shop in her house. Her husband left her, kids moved out, and she’d have guys come and clean, lick her feet and all sorts, she loved it. We talked about it over a bottle of wine. She said it gave her everything she’d not had in her life. I understood the appeal. She offered to educate me.”

  “Did you?”

  I urged his slow movements again. “I’ve never told anyone this.”

  “You’re safe with me, I promise.” He licked his lips as he moved.

  I spoke breathy and low. “I went, and I didn’t like the men. It was strange for me. Greg had been away for work, but I think it was when he first met whatsername. I was lonely and bored. The idea was appealing, but it wasn’t about her. It wasn’t an exchange of wants, it was all about them. She was providing a service, but to those guys wasn’t about submitting to a woman, it was about being humiliated, about them. I told her it wasn’t for me.”

  “It’s different things to everyone, and sometimes that’s true, but not always.”

  “What do you like?”

  “Pegging. Not so much humiliation but… giving up power and control. Trusting another to take care of me.”

  “She went through some of the basics. Consent, negotiation, risks, we talked a lot.”

  I pushed him off and straddled him.

  “We can get you a strap-on if you like.”

  I nodded, sinking down onto his cock. He made sense to me, and where I’d been tentative, I saw a path, and I wanted to take it.

  “What else do you like?”

  “Being…” he arched his back, and I scratched down his chest. “Tied up.”

  “I want to know.”

  We looked at each other.

  “Do you have scarves, belts, anything?”

  I wet my lips and pulled off, fetching a couple of scarves. He showed me easy to release knots, and I secured his wrists. His heart raced and sliding back over him, I put my hand on his chest to feel it.

  “If I want out, you let me out.”

  “I swear.”

  Snaking my nails down his arms, he squirmed, and we didn’t look away from each other. I was enraptured.

  I could have fucked him, but I practised my Kegels instead.

  THERE IT IS

  I’d done a lot of gym classes, but I woke sore and alone. Blinking, I grinned. His jeans were still on the floor, and I stretched, checking the time. Ten past six.

  Unfortunately, I had things to do. I grabbed my robe and leant on the hall wall watching him make breakfast, naked.

  I was so distracted by the delightful sight I was too slow realising that the front door was being opened and it was Ceeli trying to sneak in.

  The whole thing happened in slow motion.

  She stumbled, Will froze, balls out, and she screamed.

  He covered himself with a tea towel.

  She looked from him to me as I lunged for a throw to give him.

  “Oh. My. God.” She burst out laughing, and he was a beetroot.

  “Ceeli.”

  She clapped her hand over her mouth, bent over. Will sighed and looked plaintively at me, but I had to purse to lips hard so I wouldn’t join her.

  He tossed the tea towel in the air and sauntered back into the bedroom.

  “Taking it slow.” She wiped the tears from her eyes. “I’m sorry.”

  “No, I’m sorry. That wasn’t appropriate to have him stay.”

  “No, I’m happy for you. Promise.” She hugged me. “Ugh, you wreak of shagging, gross. I’m taking a shower.” She left, and I finished making breakfast and took the tray in the bedroom.

  He was sat on the bed, head in hands half-dressed.

  “Here.” I put the tray down. Flashes of the previous night came back. The affection, the torment of riding him and edging him as he begged.

  “I’m so sorry. I forgot.”

  “She’s not upset.” I passed him a coffee, and we drank.

  “I should go.”

  “Don’t. Please.” I shifted to face him, not sure what to say.

  “Last night was amazing. It was so good.”

  I went cold at something in his tone.

  “I swore I’d never do this again.” I barely heard his voice.

  “Do what?”

  “Enter into this kind of relationship. Because that’s what it’d be. A relationship. Not just scenes and play. I can’t do that.”

  “Okay.” I was so close to something wonderful. The sight of him at my mercy, the ecstasy that brought for both of us. I’d come three times. All the secrets we spilt to each other in those hours were a bond. I felt it in my gut. “If that’s how you feel, you should go.” I put the cups on the untouched breakfast tray.

  He looked at me for a second and nearly said something. His mouth moved, pained eyes on me, but he thought better of it, picked up his clothes, dressing while I stared at nothing.

  “For the record, this is a really shitty thing to do.”

  He went still. “I know.”

  “Last night was the best sex, and it’s closer to a truth I didn’t know about myself than I’ve ever experienced.”

  “Neither of us want a relationship. We agreed that. Go play and scene and find out who you are.”

  “I don’t want to.”

  “What do you want?”

  “You.” I stood.

  He stepped back. “I can’t give you that.”

  “Then why last night? Why make us breakfast?”

  “I don’t know. The sex we have is so good, I can’t hold back or be anything but honest with you. I was making it and kept thinking about us and… I don’t know. I can’t do this.”

  The moment strung out, and I took a slow breath.

  “You should go.”

  And he was gone. The front door clicked shut, and I put my hand over my mouth. That night had changed everything. He gave me what I didn’t know I wanted. He showed me possibilities in a way that felt right, and the fucker just snatched it away.

  ✽✽✽

  The days
after that passed quickly, but I didn’t really experience them, even for the good fortune. I couldn’t feel it. I got the contract I’d bid for, took on another crew, and needed more than my flat to work from.

  I took a small office in an untouched part of town, but it had decent bus links, accessibility and storage. It was a year contract on a start-up business programme in a building due for the next stage regen project. Not ideal, but I could get in there quickly.

  It was hectic and busy as winter faded into spring, and Ceeli moved out.

  She moped with me, and we bitched over wine, but I saw the change in her. She left at Easter and moved into a house share of trainee nurses.

  Ceeli had a friend who helped me sort out my IT needs, and in no time, I was rolling and set up.

  Still, I thought of Will all the time and the more I dwelt, the more bitter I became. I didn’t date or make friends, or anything other than work. I especially didn’t do as he suggested. I focused on my business, which before him was all I had. But I was alone and cold in my heart.

  Greg tried to get in contact a few times, but through my solicitor, I made him back off.

  Ceeli told me his girlfriend was pregnant. My heart sank. I’d never felt so much regret or pity in my life.

  AND THEY LIVED HAPPILY… OH

  June was hot. Ceeli was visiting as term was over and she had a week off from work, and we sat in the communal garden as I enjoyed a rare weekend off. Time had shot by; I was so busy. I barely had time to sleep. Ceeli worried about me, and I agreed to spend time with her.

  “I saw dad.” She looked pissed off.

  “Ah, that’s why you’re here.”

  “He said he’d been having a rough time and was sorry.”

  “Because he knocked her up?”

  “Yep. They’re giving it a go. Apparently.”

  “Poor kid. Won’t last more than a year.”

  She shifted her sunglasses. “I like her, and she’s happy about the baby, but I think she knows deep down it’s doomed.”

  “It’s life, nothing is permanent.”

  Banging brought my attention around, but Ceeli was already taking her sunglasses off.

  At the back of the building, builders were putting up scaffolding, and my heart dropped into my feet.

  “Oh no, do you think he’s here? It’s the same company, right?” Ceeli strained to see what was going on.

  “Yep.” I’d heard the previous week the next stage of work was being done to the building and been on edge knowing he’d be about.

  “On a scale of one to ten, how likely do you think it is we’ll get copped by them?”

  “Nine.”

  “Shit.”

  I slumped back on the blanket we sat on.

  A breeze swayed the tree branches above us, and the dappled light shifted. We watched for a minute, and I saw Will. He wore cargos, boots and a snug white tee.

  “Holy shit, mum he’s here.”

  “Holy shit indeed.”

  “Right. What are you going to do? How are we playing this?”

  “Casual. I don’t care, no fucks given. Maybe a joke. He means nothing.”

  “Show no pain. You still like him.”

  I didn’t say anything, and she kissed my cheek.

  Will lifted off his hard hat and ran his fingers through his damp hair, and I almost felt it in my hands.

  He stilled as the builder talking to him was watching us, and he turned.

  We both lay back, and I died inside. Bikini top and shorts.

  A minute later he stood over us, and I cringed.

  Ceeli propped herself up. “I didn’t recognise you with your clothes on. Come to do some more banging and screwing?” She gave him a pert, derisive smile.

  I coughed a laugh.

  “We did the front, and now we’re doing the back.” The wariness in his voice was the only sound as he looked at me.

  “Nice, the back does need seeing to. Will there be drilling?” Her voice was overly perky.

  He pursed his lips. “It’s likely.”

  “Ceeli, enough.”

  “How are you?”

  I sat up, pulling on my vest. “Fine.”

  “We need to bring some equipment out here.”

  Humiliation burnt my cheeks, and we packed up in silence.

  “I was hoping to see you.”

  “Were you. How cute.”

  “Please.”

  We headed in, but I turned back. “Listen to me.” I took my sunglasses off. “Let me make this clear. It was a brief bit of rebound fun. Nothing else.”

  “I can’t stop thinking about you.”

  “That’s not my problem.”

  I went in. He looked so good I wanted to scream.

  Ceeli and I changed and went into town, and I didn’t see him. But the look in his eyes, the way he said those words lured him back from being a fantasy laced with regret to an ache.

  We went for pizza, and I moved my glass of icy drink around, running my finger along the condensation.

  “Mum?”

  “Hmm.”

  “There’s something else, well, the actual reason I’m here. I haven’t told dad.” She chewed the inside of her cheek.

  “What is it?” A thousand horrors ran through my mind.

  “I’m… I’m bisexual.”

  “Oh.” I put my hand to my heart. “For a minute there I thought you had bad news or were pregnant or something.” I let my breath go, reached over and took her hand. “Are you happy?”

  “Yes.” She gave me a sweet smile, and I saw a light in her eyes I hadn’t seen for years. “I met a girl.”

  Emotion choked my throat. “Oh my sweetheart, I’m so happy for you. I can’t want to meet her.”

  The grin on her face split it. She seemed different. More relaxed. A shift in her maturity.

  “Tell me about her.”

  Her girlfriend, Shay, was a nursing student. She showed me a photo of a black woman in glasses with a sweet smile and large eyes.

  “She’s very pretty.”

  “She’s kind and fun. And a nerd, she’s great.” The joy in her face dimmed. “I’m worried about telling dad.”

  “I can imagine. Well, I love you, and as long as you’re happy, that’s what matters to me.”

  My baby was growing up, finding her place, and it was beautiful and sad to watch. I think I’d done a good job.

  “What about Mr Builder guy?”

  “Nope.”

  “Come on. The way he looked at you.” She raised her brows and took a massive bite of her pizza.

  “He probably hasn’t- No, I’m not discussing this with you.”

  “You still like him.”

  “Maybe but honey, we don’t always get what we want. He really hurt me, and it was everything I wanted to avoid.”

  “I want you to be happy.”

  “I’m old, it’s too late for me.”

  “You’re not forty.”

  “I feel about a hundred and ten, an old corpse, dragging itself along.”

  “I think you should see him.”

  “I think you should stuff the rest of that slice in your gob.”

  She did, and I laughed.

  The builders had left by the time we got back, and Ceeli looked at me twice.

  I opened the bay and looked out into the summer haze of the city, orange light already fading. I thought about that cold night in February when Will showed me his dimples and put his fingers inside me. I smirked. I knew so little about him really, yet enough to mean it was hard to let that go. Seeing him stirred up more regret, and I didn’t want regret, I’d had enough of it.

  Ceeli left on Sunday. She was spending the summer working away and staying with Shay. I hoped it wasn’t going too fast, but I had a sinking feeling she’d not stay in Chadford after she graduated next year, and I’d be alone. It wasn’t a bad thing. I just didn’t want to be alone.

  I gu
ess I had to get used to it.

  TOOL

  Monday was busy, and it was after seven when I got home. Crossing the car park, I saw his truck parked with the company logo on, and he eased out his car. Blue checked shirt, cuffed sleeves, tanned skin, he was beautiful as ever.

  “Amelia.”

  I didn’t spare him a glance, but he followed me in.

  “Please.”

  I reached my door and opened it. “Don’t get weird.”

  His eyes flickered. “I’m sorry, I hoped I could speak to you.”

  “Speak to me.” I laughed. “You’re not one of those weird arseholes who thinks harassment is romantic, are you? Is this a pattern of behaviour I can expect?”

  He paled.

  I wanted to shut the door in his face but didn’t. “So, now you’re doing more work here you thought you’d try and manipulate me to get another fuck?”

  “No, that’s not-”

  “Fine, you want to fuck, let’s fuck.” I grabbed him and pulled him inside. I’m not an angry person generally. I’m rarely reckless. With him, I’d been exactly that. In the cold, boring months between seeing him, I felt so little.

  He gawped for a minute, a slow smirk appearing. “All right, this is what you want?”

  “Fuck it. Yes.” I threw my arms out.

  “What do you want?” He came close to me.

  I searched his eyes. The tan and smattering of freckles up close were even more attractive. The first lines at his eyes.

  “Huh? What is it?” He spoke into my mouth.

  My heart raced, and I swallowed loudly.

  “You don’t even know, do you? Couldn’t take it if you tried.”

  I met his eyes, raising a brow. “Are you trying to provoke me?”

  “What makes you think that?” His mouth was even closer, and I shivered when his breath whispered against my lips.

  The tension thickened. He was irresistible. I grabbed his hair and kissed him. My lips bruised against his, and his arms curled around my waist pulling me into him sharply. I struggled with his shirt, pulling it off while he wrestled with the sleeves, and when I reached his fly, he stilled. My lips tingled against his.

  Those work-roughened hands cupped my face, and he smiled slightly. I sneered and pulled him back in for a moment but pushed him away until he stumbled. Emotion closed my throat, and I turned away.